Milica Kennedy Kastner has authorised me to speak candidly about her and her situation. Milica is ill, very ill, but she is also remarkable in the face of death and her story is to be featured in the Tatler in January. But she is not being featured for the tittle tattle which has surrounded her life - she will be remembered –for her inspiration
Milica is the daughter of the world-famous film producer Elliott Kastner, who is best known for his film Where Eagles Dare. She was brought up in Hollywood surrounded by household names such as Paul McCartney and Rudolph Nureyev
Her mother is the glamourous Tessa Kennedy who was a renowned interior designer to the rich and famous. Tessa’ mother was a great beauty and was known as the Pearl of Dubrovnik. Her best friends were Prince Rainer and Princess Grace of Monaco who she would visit regularly with her children.
Tessa shot to fame as a teenager when she eloped aged 18 to Cuba where she got married. Her father made her a ward of court to get her back and the scandal hit the press!
There is nothing ‘ordinary’ about Milica and her family!
Milica’s godfather is the King of Jordan, who she spent a few days with, in the Summer and her godmother is Joan Collins – who she had lunch with last week – everyone wants to see Milica – she is so ‘bonnie’.
She even spent some time with Deborah as they were travelling together on the tube. Milica entertained her (and indeed the whole carriage) with her story of how she and Robbie Williams had formed a pact that they would be married if they had not found other partners by a certain age. She has asked Robbie to sing at her funeral and he has accepted!
Milica has been diagnosed with stage four cancer. She has had 60% of her liver removed, a tumour the size of a golf ball taken out of her brain, her uterus is gone, and she has had umpteen operations on her lungs. But through it all remains true to herself – simply incredible!
This is not a story of hope – her prospect of living to see her teenage daughter go down the aisle or her son aged 16 play professional football seems unlikely
It is neither a story of despair, she is not angry at God – for cutting her life short at 48, she does not fear death – “Just think - I won’t have to worry about silly little things anymore!”
She is not in denial, either– which is why Milica and I have been able to make such rapid progress in sorting out some complex financial matters with her siblings in the US as well as in London.
Milica does not worry about death she says ‘I am not the Director of this show. It is not up to me when the curtain comes down – so why worry?’
All of us are vaguely aware that one day we will die – but most of us are in denial – not Milica. ‘I am so fortunate’ she says ‘I know that I am going to die – so I spend time with my kids, my friends and my family. Just think how awful it would be if I just keeled over or was hit by a bus – with no time to make plans, or to spend time with my loved ones’
‘We all hide behind silly masks – concerned what we look like, what people think of us, and wanting to do the right thing. It is all so stupid. I wanted to drop my masks, be the real me and much to my surprise people respond so positively’.
Milia does not feel she needs to wear a wig – she has a great shaped head. ‘To begin with I felt ashamed of my bald head, but then realised that it was great not to have to wash and style my hair everyday – and to feel the breeze on my head’.
Everyone is inspired by Milica; for example, she never forgets to ask, ‘How are you?’ which is a remarkably challenging question when asked by someone who is at death’s door. All concerns and worries seem so trivial and stupid – by comparison.
Each day she is thrilled to be alive, she is full of gratitude for the love and warmth her friends and family have poured upon her – and she deserves it – she is an inspiration to us all – and not just for those of us who are not familiar with disease and death
Last winter she went with her kids to the Somerset House ice rink. On the rink was one of her oncology nurses who made a beeline for Milica – ‘I just wanted to say that at the hospital we believe you were God sent, to inspire us how to live every day at a time’ which is precisely what she does.
Last week I shared Milica’s story with other Private Client Professionals on our Coffee with Caroline Client Stories Zoom call.
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